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    Relationships Crumble: Ex Blocks Homecoming as Mom Battled Lung Cancer

    In the r/AskWomen subreddit, user u/thinkinginkling recently posed the question, ‘What was the moment in your last relationship that made you say, ‘Yup, I’m breaking up with you?”.

    heart drawn on a cracked sidewalk
    Here are some of the heart-wrenching replies:
    The last boyfriend I had neglected me, never did anything for me, blew me off for other people, and sometimes even insulted me. But if I’m honest, what really turned it around for me was finding a Dove chocolate wrapper on my floor. It was like a wake-up call, a vision of cleaning up his messes for the rest of time. Although I didn’t break up with him immediately, it definitely set me on that path. That little blue wrapper, sitting on my nice, clean carpet… I just couldn’t ignore it.

    woman looking out a window
    A close family member recently passed away, and to my surprise, instead of offering support and empathy, my partner began complaining and demanding sex. It was shocking to me that during such a difficult time, he expected to be rewarded for his minimal effort of driving me to the funeral. This incident made me realize the lack of sensitivity and understanding in our relationship. It’s important to prioritize emotional connection and compassion, especially during times of grief.
    We were on vacation, and as we made our way to retrieve our luggage, they turned to me and said, ‘I’m ecstatic that we’re together, but wow, I can’t help but imagine how delightful it would be to have the company of some of the other women around here.’ I didn’t respond, and although I had been contemplating ending our relationship, that remark was the ultimate tipping point. Their face, scanning the surroundings as they uttered those words, is still vivid in my memory.

    woman frustrated sitting at the airport
    When I discovered that my mom was diagnosed with lung cancer, my ex-boyfriend opposed my decision to fly back home for her surgery. He argued that my business was still in its early stages, and he didn’t want me to be away for two weeks. Despite his objections, I made the choice to go home anyway. Thankfully, my mom’s surgery was successful, and she is now doing great. In addition, my business has thrived and is flourishing.
    He cheated multiple times, and I tried to deal with it. Should have left the first time. Then one night, when we were going to bed, he was on the furthest side of the bed, almost up in the corner — a grown man as far away as he could be on a queen mattress so he wouldn’t be near me. He said he wasn’t happy and wasn’t attracted to me. I said, ‘This is enough,’ and went the next day and got the divorce papers. It’s been 10 years, and I’m still single.

    woman sitting up in bed with her partner unaware behind her on his phone
    We did shrooms, and I was like, ‘Holy shit, I actually hate this guy.’
    While I was finishing up engineering school, he said to me, ‘As long as I make more money, I don’t have to contribute as much to cooking and cleaning — my contribution is set.’ Considering he was an established engineer for Ford, and we had been dating for 4 years, I realized that I would rather not be his house slave on a journey to catch up.

    couple ignoring each other on a couch
    The final straw was me saying, ‘I need emotional support.’ Him: ‘Can’t you get that from your friends?’
    Man, I just wanted to sleep. He wouldn’t let me. He had always been controlling, and I tolerated it for too long. One morning, as he was berating me for wanting to rest after working the night shift, I had an epiphany: if I didn’t escape this situation, I would be stuck in a cycle of exhausting work and mistreatment. I would be expected to work tirelessly both at my job and at home, while receiving no support or appreciation. Eventually, he realized I wasn’t going to tolerate it any longer, but his sudden change of heart was too little, too late.

    couple arguing
    He inquired if I could be his backup plan.
    I was on the fence about our future already, but then as we were leaving a restaurant, he went on about how the waitress was so disrespectful and rude to him. Because of that, he was seething mad and didn’t want me to talk to him for a bit. I was baffled because the waitress wasn’t rude.

    couple fighting at the bar
    He didn’t appreciate my individuality and attempted to mold me into his image. Eventually, I began to dread visiting his home, realizing it was time for us to part ways.
    I was feeling extremely sick, but he completely disregarded me, engrossed in his phone watching sports. It was really frustrating and upsetting.

    man on the couch smiling into his phone
    I was incredibly content and confident in my relationship until he uttered the words, ‘Sometimes, I wish you were slimmer.’ It shattered me completely because I have always been self-conscious about my weight.
    I was unable to have a calm and mature conversation about our relationship, expectations, and future. I was shamed for my general curiosity about various subjects (they disliked that I have many interests and hobbies). Just felt uncomfortable and exhausted by their presence and behavior. My feelings for them naturally diminished, and I gave up.

    frustrated couple sitting next to each on a couch
    The last ex was a nice enough guy. We were in a long-distance relationship, with him living just one state away. He would come and spend the weekend with me once or twice a month. During his last visit, we were watching the Discovery Channel and stumbled upon a fascinating show about dinosaurs. At one point, he chuckled and confidently stated, ‘Yeah right, the Earth is only 6,000 years old.’ Little did I know, this would be the final straw.
    He wouldn’t dance with me. Obviously, there were other issues going on, but he wouldn’t dance with me at a party put on by his friends. It was a silly, fun party, with a silly theme, and ’70s music, my FAVORITE. He wouldn’t agree to even try to dance to even one song, just stood or sat by a wall, on his phone from time to time. I just knew I didn’t want to spend the rest of my life dancing alone because my partner wouldn’t dance with me.

    woman sitting by herself with a glass of champagne
    Do you remember the precise moment you realized a relationship was finished? Share your story in the comments section below.

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